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June 29, 2005

lousy!!

**ok. this is how today went, shitty if you ask me. Kelly called a couple days ago and tells me that they're looking for someone to work in the office in the doctor's office she's doing her internship for medical assisting at. i talked to her this morning, and shes like "yeah, they're still looking for someone. you should bring your resume by, i already told sandra about you."
**so... i take a bath, get dressed (and this is no small feat. i had to put on (ick!) business clothes (ick!)). anyway, i put on my dress slacks, knee-high stockings (hehe), my black three-quarter dress shirt. combed my hair quite nicely and left it down for once, despite the 100F weather outside. i even put on make-up. i looked damn good, or so i thought.
**i drove all the way across town. not a long distance, but long enough when its further than i usually drive, which generally consists of a 3 mile round trip from home to my grandmas. so, i combed my hair again to make sure, checked the mirror to make sure my make-up hadn't melted off between the house and the car. looked to make sure there wasnt anything stuck in my teeth, made sure there wasnt any mascara goo stuck to my eyelashes and whatnot.
**i walked into the office, the phones werent ringing and there was only one patient waiting. im thinking, hell yeah, i can do this. piece of cake. i thought wrong.
**i walked up to the reception window and asked for sandra. the dialog went like this:
me: hello, may i speak with sandra, please?
her: yeah.
me: are you sandra?
her: yup.
me: hello, my name is jennifer. i'm a friend of kelly's, your student intern.
her: yeah?
me: kelly tells me you are looking for someone to help in the office.
her: yeah, and?
me: i have a resume.
her: ok.
i handed her my resume.
her: ok. bye.
**talk about lousy! thats the worst pre-interview i have EVER had. i walked out of there wanting to cry. so i went and saw my mom instead, after text-messaging her to let her know what's up. she thought it was bunk. i called justin. he thought it sucked. i called my grandma and shes like "well, thats the way things are. suck it up." how's that for support. i came home, stripped out of my "good" clothes and still want to sit here and bawl my eyes out. im |this close| to calling this place i used to work, where i got the crap beaten out of me almost every time i showed up for my shift, and BEGGING them to give me my job back. i got fired from there twice, but that was 4-5 years ago. maybe they've forgotten...

June 24, 2005

UGH! dentist!

if you've read the last three entries, im sure you know what's going on with my teeth. anyway, they're not really any better since i was at the jerk dentist's office the other day. the teeth dont grind together as bad, but the jaw and throat muscles and gums hurt like hell. im getting yet -another- prescription for pain meds later today. on a good note though, they've also moved my appointment for tuesday up to monday morning. this is good. i dont know how much longer i can handle this. ive thought of pulling the damn thing myself.

June 21, 2005

another update

another update... i took my third chemo shot yesterday. i may not need to take anymore. we'll discuss it at the next doctor's visit, on july 19th. they put me on another pill, premarin, to help with the hotflashes/moodswings/sleeplessness/night sweats. i hope it helps. i took the first one last night and they said i should see some results in the next few days. yay... i think.

why me! damn my teeth. -- update

**ok, so i went to a dentist earlier. mine is on vacation this week so they referred me to a different guy. not something i was happy about, but i was -that- desperate to get this taken care of. i go in, they take an x-ray... and it all goes downhil from there.
**the motherfucker puts the carbon between my teeth and tells me to bite down and grind my teeth. i winced and he said "keep doing it, i have to know where to drill!" so then, he started grinding down my tooth. the one i had the root canal on last week. *cringe*. no anesthetic. none. not even the gas! or something to numb it with. nothing. so we go into this little ritual. carbon, bite, grind, drill. over and over again. by the time he was done, tears were streaming down my face. and he just smiled and sent me on my way.
**it wasn't fun, thats for sure. im no wimp and im certainly no stranger to pain, but i swear, id rather have a never-ending migraine than dental pain. UGH! the nurse said the swelling should go down in a couple hours, and i should be able to eat real food again tomorrow, if not tonight.
**apparently, the problem was that when they made my temporary crown, it was too long/tall. so when i bit down, it would irritate the gums and jaw and all the nerves around there. therefore, making them swell, and pushing the tooth up even more. no wonder i was in so much pain. *sigh*

why me! damn my teeth.

i had a root canal last week and my jaw and gums are swollen and hurting badly. i cant close my teeth all the way, much less chew on the left side at all. i got so desperate, i even squirted half a tube of orajel along my gums yesterday. so...
tuesday next week, i have seven teeth that need to be sealed (they're beginning to get cavities)and then i get to have two crowns.
i have horrible dental genes and i have a calcium deficiency because im allergic to milk. i take good care of my teeth, but it doesnt seem to really matter in the grand scheme of things. i floss. i use mouthwash. i brush my teeth -at least- twice a day. with colgate total with baking soda and peroxide, or with crest's vanilla mint. yet none of that seems to matter or help.
anyway, today i get to go to the dentist. im *so* excited. not. *shrug*