![]() |
![]() ![]() |
![]() |
![]()
Post
#1
|
|
![]() Advanced Member ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 151 Joined: 22-April 05 Member No.: 19 ![]() |
WOMAN'S PERFECT BREAKFAST
> >She's sitting at the table with her gourmet coffee. >Her son is on the cover of the Wheaties box. >Her daughter is on the cover of Business Week. >Her boyfriend is on the cover of Playgirl. >And her husband is on the back of the milk carton. > >WOMEN'S REVENGE > >"Cash, check or charge?" I asked, after folding items the woman wished to purchase. As she fumbled for her wallet I noticed a remote control for a television set in her purse. > >So, do you always carry your TV remote?" I asked > >"No," she replied, " but my husband refused to come shopping with me, and I figured this was the most evil thing I could do to him legally." > > >UNDERSTANDING WOMEN (A MAN'S PERSPECTIVE) > >I know I'm not going to understand women. >I'll never understand how you can take boiling hot wax pour it onto your upper thigh, rip the hair out by the root, and still be afraid of a spider. > >MARRIAGE SEMINAR > >While attending a Marriage Seminar dealing with communication, Tom and his wife Grace listened to the instructor, > >"It is essential that husbands and wives know the things that are important to each other." > >He addressed the man, "Can you describe your wife's favorite flower?" >Tom leaned over, touched his wife's arm gently and whispered, "It's Pillsbury, isn't it? > >The rest of the story gets rather ugly, so I'll stop right here. > >CIGARETTES AND TAMPONS > >A man walks into a pharmacy and wanders up and down the aisles. The sales girl notices him and asks him if she can help him. He answers that he is looking for a box of tampons for his wife. She directs him down the correct aisle. A few minutes later, he deposits a huge bag of cotton balls and a ball of string on the counter. > >She says, confused, "Sir, I thought you were looking for some tampons for your wife?" > >He answers, " You see, it's like this, yesterday, I sent my wife to the store to get me a carton of cigarettes, and she came back with a tin of tobacco and some rolling papers; cause it's sooo-ooo--oo-ooo much cheaper. So, I figure if I have to roll my own ........... so does she." (I figure this guy is the one on the milk carton!) > >WIFE VS HUSBAND > >A couple drove down a country road for several miles, not saying a word. An earlier discussion had led to an argument and neither of them wanted to concede their position. As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats, and pigs, the husband asked sarcastically, "Relatives of yours?" > >"Yep," the wife replied, "in-laws." > >WORDS > >A husband read an article to his wife about how many words women use a day... 30,000 to a man's 15,000. > >The wife replied, "The reason has to be because we have to repeat everything to men." > >The husband then turned to his wife and asked, "What?" > >CREATION > >A man said to his wife one day, "I don't know how you can be so stupid and so beautiful all at the same time." > >"The wife responded, "Allow me to explain. God made me beautiful so you would be attracted to me; God made me stupid so I would be attracted to you!" > >WHO DOES WHAT > >A man and his wife were having an argument about who should brew the coffee each morning. > >The wife said, "You should do it, because you get up first, and then we don't have to wait as long to get our coffee." > >The husband said, " You are in charge of cooking around here and you should do it, because that is your job, and I can just wait for my coffee." > >Wife replies, "No, you should do it, and besides, it is in the Bible that the man should do the coffee." > >Husband replies, "I can't believe that, show me." > >So she fetched the Bible, and opened the New Testament and showed him at the top of several pages, that it indeed says.........."HEBREWS" -------------------- |
|
|
![]()
Post
#2
|
|
![]() Advanced Member ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 135 Joined: 20-April 05 From: West Virginia USA Member No.: 9 ![]() |
I refuse to reply to such sexist comments
![]() ![]() ![]() -------------------- ![]() S rhioghal Mo Dhream B' fheàrr Gàidhlig briste na Beurla cliste. |
|
|
![]()
Post
#3
|
|
![]() Advanced Member ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 95 Joined: 20-April 05 From: a dank little corner. Member No.: 12 ![]() |
pansy.
-------------------- i r teh f.cknut! ph34r, and b0w b3f0arh m3h!
|
|
|
![]() ![]() |
![]() |
Lo-Fi Version | Time is now: 1st May 2025 - 06:24 PM |