Random Work Conversations Options

[dilandou]

I've mentioned it elsewhere before, but me and one of the drivers i work with have rather interesting conversations:

(after seeing a helicopter on a trailer)
Len: Ah, i see they found my helicopter then.
Me: Oh? What's wrong with it?
Len: Got a puncture.

Me: I don't mind the rain and all, after ya get wet, yer wet. It's just that riding a bike in the rain gets yer feet wet where it's forced into the toes.
Len: What about if you put the boots on backwards?
Me: Yeah i tried that once. Made it hard to change gear.

(I have a thing against ford mondeo's.)
Me: Ya notice that as soon as it starts to rain you don't see any Mondeo's?
Len: Yeah, funny that ain't it.
Me: There's a perfectly good reason for it tho, i heard.
Len: Oh?
Me: Indeed. Quite terrible, in fact. Y'see. When it rains, Mondeo's get wet.
Len: Wet? That's terrible.
Me: You're telling me. What's more, they drip! On the road, no less!
Len: That's a danger to all other road users. Making the road wet and slippery. Atrotious.

Len: Where's that sun gone then, eh [dil]?
Me: Dunno. It's like those bastard binmen. They're never around when they're supposed to be.

(we were doing bins in a private school and the darling little kiddywinks were walking behind the truck while we were tring to work and then reverse. so i started a loud conversation)
Me: Yanno, i reckon there should be a new law passed.
Len: Hmm?
Me: I reckon that binmen should be exempt from laws agaisnt physical abuse.
Len: Why's that?
Me: Well, then when some little shit walks out behind the truck we can retaliate by fetching a bin and throwing it at them.
Len: sounds like a good idea to me.
Me: I rather thought so. The fun part is when they complain.
Mr RetardedMonkeybrains (the other guy): Yeah, because then you can like say like and yeah like we're like yeah shit tryin to like yeah fuckin work like yeah and shit and stuff.
Me: well, no. you just throw another bin at them. then it becomes an experiment, see. find out how many times they need a bin thrown at them before they realise it's the whining that's causing it.
Len: Sounds perfect.
Me: But i'm a fair man. I'd not throw a bin at a girl.
Mr RetardedMonkeybrains: nah. coz yeah like and shit like fuck i mean yeah can't like yeah hit girls and shit yeah.
Me: indeed. i'd throw a bin at their boyfriend instead. if they complained, i'd /then/ be allowed to use the bin as a cludgel.
Len: you'd make a good prime minister with ideas like that.


## UNRELATED ##

Random passer by (usually some stupid little shit): Ewww! Your truck stinks!
Me: Should do, it's your crap that's in there.

[sin]

id throw bins at the girls anyway. anyone that stupid to walk behind a garbage truck while its reverseing deserves to have garbage tossed on them.

[Gimpi]

Mr RetardedMonkeybrains sounds like a real pain in the ass.