The Purina Diet Options

[maxnmike]

I have a Labrador retriever and was buying a large bag of Purina at Wal-Mart,
waiting in line to check out. A woman behind me asked if I had a dog. (duh?)

On impulse I told her no, I was starting The Purina Diet again, although I probably
shouldn't because I'd ended up in the hospital the last time. I told her I'd lost 50
pounds before I woke up in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most
of my orifices and IVs in both arms.

I said that it was essentially a perfect diet and the way it works is to load your
pants pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel
hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so I was going to try it one more time.

I have to mention here that practically everyone in the line was by now enthralled
with my story, particularly a tall, black guy who was behind her.

Horrified, she asked if the dog food had poisoned me, to end up in the hospital like that.

I told her no, I'd been sitting in the street licking my balls and a car hit me.

I thought the black guy was going to need help as he staggered to the door in hysterics.